I was not expecting what was to come
(This is full of grammatical errors—just over them for now)
Today was a very long day. It began at 5 am. By 5:30 a.m. I was off to do my volunteer work at Princeton Community Hospital. Volunteering is a great thing to do. However, I was not expecting what was to come. I entered “PCH” at exactly 6am–a full hour from the scheduled time at 7 am (I was infact told 6am the night before). No big deal; I asked if there was anything that needed to be done while I waited. I was taken to the chapel, and told to clean the carpet and the pews. After I had finished cleaning the carpets, I heard an elderly lady ask if she could enter the chapel to say a prayer. I said “of course.” I began to clean the other side of the pews as the elderly lady pulled out the kneeler and knelt down to pray. I decided to walk outside for a few moments to give her some privacy. As I was about to exit the door of the chapel, she stopped me asking: ” young man, would you help me up?” I did, and we started talking. We sat in pew facing the stain glass window of a dove. She ended up telling me that she was there today to get her test results back on a tumor that was removed. Cancer is a very scary thing; I’ve witnessed too many people die from it. She explained to me that she was all alone: her husband passed away 20 years ago, her daughter died in a car crash in 2010, and her son does not speak to her. She wanted someone to be there with her when she heard her results read to her. Obviously, this was a bit to much for me, but how could I tell her no? For a brief moment, there seemed to be a small glimmer of hope in her fading brown eyes as she waited for me to answer. I told her yes, if thats what she wanted. She then explained that she would have to wait until 10:30 a.m. I informed her that I would be there until 12 (probably at the front desk), and she could have one of the nurses come get me. She was very thankful. I finished cleaning the chapel, and left her there alone. By this time, it was 8:15am. I went back to the font desk and did some basic cleanings: a wipe down of the desk, a quick sweep in front of the desk where the people walk, and through away some old file folders. I had a fairly easy job after that: to set behind the desk to greet and answer any questions that guest may have. At about 10:15 a.m., a nurse came and got me, and took me to the waiting area where the elderly lady from earlier was sitting. At this point I was really nervous, but I thought to myself that my nervousness is nothing compared to what she is experienced. I sat down beside her, and she immediately grabbed my hand. We sat there for five or so minutes ( it seemed like an eternity) waiting for the doctor. Surprisingly, he arrived exactly at 10:30 am. The news was not good. When he answered her last question, she immediately started to weep. I had no idea what to do, so I offered an embrace. She placed her head on my shoulder and sobbed. After the doctor basically offered little hope, he left the room. She was still crying on my shoulder. She pulled away to get a tissue. I told her that I would leave the room so she could have some time alone to process what had just happened. At this point, I was also a mess…what does one say in a time like this? I honestly had no idea what to do or say. I made the choice to go back down to the front desk. After about 30 minutes there, the elderly lady came up to the desk and thanked me. She expressed how much it meant to her to have someone there with her at that moment, and how much comfort it brought her to have some one to embrace her at such a time. At that moment, I knew that my actions ( seemingly meaningless in my thoughts) had meant the world to her. I learned that even our smallest actions can have a huge impact on others. I was very happy that I was able to bring her some comfort. I left PCH at 11:55 a.m. Not sure how to process all of this, I headed to the only place where I can clear my mind: nature.
I went back to Pipestem State Park. I hiked numerous trails and jogged/walked the entire length of the park ( from entrance to the Lodge) 3 times. I could not seem to shake the mental image of this elderly lady crying. During my final hike, on Lick Hollow Trail, I saw a deer picking at some grass. I was actually surprised that it was not running away. I stat down on a rock and just gazed at the deer. I thought about how it must feel to have a threat of death on you–to be hunted by others. I pulled out my phone to snap a photo. As I was reviewing the photo, i noticed that in the photo, the deer had looked directly at me. I turned my gaze away from the photo back up to the deer only to realize it had already gone. In that moment, I realized that I had seen that elderly woman before. I had seen her a few times over the years at Sunday Mass. Now, I am not a very religious person, and I do not believe in signs and wonders. However, whether it was god, nature or just timing, I do believe I was right where I needed to be today. At this point, I felt a lot better, but I was physically and emotionally drained: I had hiked/walked/jogged a total of 18.3+ miles today. I walked slowly back to my truck, and I felt the breeze on my face. It felt wonderful. You know, its amazing how nature can affect our lives.
Here is my photo of the deer as referenced earlier:
I named it Javan--an ancient Greek name meaning "understanding."
scottyhagerman 